Is it Friday yet?

Wow, this has seemed like a very long week. Work is crazy and I seem to be working yet not getting anything accomplished. that's not fun! I really don't have much to say but I thought I would post.

Congrats to Nicole and Adam on the birth of Ellison Faith. I love looking at pictures of ellie, she's SO beautiful! So keep them coming! I can't wait to see y'all and meet Ellie!

And yesterday, I got the new Josh Wilson cd. "Shake the Shadow"... it's really good. I'm looking forward to this weekend. Josh will be playing at Daybreak on 82nd on Friday night at 7PM. Then I think he plays Sunday night at Southcrest so i'll be getting a double feature!

Tonight is nothing great, doing laundry and cleaning some stuff out. Fun times!

It's a beautiful day!

Well, this Friday couldn't start off any better. Well, actually it could... if I had managed to get out of bed and have a quiet time! That would have made it better. But I woke up this morning and got ready for work... and when I went outside to give Gus a treat, the sky was just amazing. When I opened the door, there was just this glow and when I looked at the clouds they were just this rosy pink and the farther the clouds went, they were a little more purple. Beautiful! I made Emily come out and look at it. (And Gus was really wanting his treats by then!) Then two minutes later, I'm pulling out of the garage and the clouds are now this buttery yellow. Way to go, God. Even now, as I look out my window, I can see the sun shining on the "steeple" part of the administration building...

And to make it even better, I'm drinking a strawberry banana smoothie from Sonic. YUM!

Now to the best part of the day... today I guess it would be 95% sure that my newest member of the family will arrive today. I can't wait to see Ellie and I know that the rest of her family can't wait to see her too. Prayers going up for Nicole and Ellie today as she enters the world!

I hope y'all have a wonderful Friday and a great weekend...

Happy Tuesday!

So hopefully this post will be a little bit more upbeat!

I really like my boss... she's definitely the type that she wants work to be done but she is also very appreciative! She just gave me a new plant just to say thank you... let's just hope that I don't kill it. I don't seem to be blessed with a green thumb! And she at Christmas, she got me burgandy and gold ornaments and a Texas Tech one! So if any of you have any great ideas on how to say thank you besides just a card, let me know!

Anyone watching "The Bachelor in Paris"?? I hadn't watched that show the last few times it has been on, but I got hooked on this one. That guy is just too cute, I love that he gave one of the girls a birthday cake and called another one's mom to see what food she liked. That's a good guy! Remind me to get hurt if I'm ever in the general vicinity of Vanderbilt ER!

Looking forward to tonight's bible study. We are going to be watching Tommy Nelson's tapes on Song of Solomon. It should be really good... and hopefully God will guard my heart tonight b/c yet another "prospect" has been lost to someone else.

Well, work is calling my name...

i'm baaaaaaaack...

Sorry that it has taken me so long to post... work has been crazy and that is usually when I manage to make a new post. Actually, its been so crazy that I haven't even had time to pee! Is that too much info?? I haven't been in the best of spirits lately, and today, I think I finally realized that everything has just now decided to hit me.

At the end of Grandma's life, I was pretty used to seeing her sick and not really responsive... or at least too tired or distracted by wanting to leave the room to have any "real" conversations with her. Luckily, that last day that I saw her, she "woke up" enough that I was able to say goodbye and tell her that I loved her and she was able to say it back. I cried a lot that day... and strangely enough, didn't shed any tears when I found out that she had passed away. In fact, I maybe cried half a minute when we were at the funeral home and I was trying to say what we should put in the casket. Since then... it's probably been one other cry that didn't last too long. Christmas came and went... it seemed different but since my childhood, all Christmas has seemed different. Well, this past weekend, we've gone to Grandma's house to go through some things. I cried (not very long) about trying to find that little green keychain that she had hanging out her fridge at the "middle" house of our childhood. It was the one that had a picture of her and Papaw in it from Hawaii. Well, of course, I couldn't find it. And today we took all this fabric and quilting stuff up to the quilters at Southcrest and that got me choked up b/c I remember so much of the time just playing under those quilts or running through Trinity Baptist.

I just think everything is hitting me at once... the loss of a family member, the possible change in jobs, and the loss of time with people that I care about. There's one friend that I literally haven't seen in probably 5 months, and she was one of the closest... then the loss of meeting weekly with another woman... and I don't really feel sad about that b/c its due to her having a new baby, but its something that I miss. And even the loss of my former positive attitude... I really felt like I grew a lot in the last year, maybe it didn't seem that I was closer to God... but I felt that He had taught me more about trying to keep focused on God's timing, being positive and always looking for the good in something. With the holidays, and my focus being on all the couples and families about, I lost that. I desperately want it back but it seems like all my emotions are in the way of blocking that as well.

I really think that Josh Wilson's song called "Savior Please" describes it best... maybe if I had more time, I'd write out the lyrics... but I'll just do a shameless plug for him. Buy his cd "Dragonfly"... www.joshwilsonmusic.com its a great one and that song is just "me" at the moment. I know that times like this when I feel the loneliest... that's the times that I need to get close with God. That's what I want. But for some reason, its really hard for me to do. I would love to be able to tell you next year that my greatest thing of 2006 was that I heard God talk to me... something that I could specifically 100% know that was God talking to me! That's what I want... and in my other prayer need: I want more friends. Literally, everyone in my life has something or someone that is their main priority. And all of them should have that someone or something in their life be that #1 (or #2 if you count second to God). I am not asking for a boyfriend (although I wouldn't mind it - that was the other cry that I had today)... and I don't even have to have that "one person" that puts me before everything. But I just want one or two friends that I can call and hang out with. I just want someone tangible that I can reach out to when I feel totally alone in the world without feeling like I am getting in the way of their live or that other someone. I just want that one or two people that I can call when i'm sitting on my butt home by myself...

Is that too much to ask? Maybe it is... God has blessed me with so much in my life... yet I want more. I guess that might be selfishness... but it is the desire of my heart at the moment.

I hope that the next post is a little more upbeat and a little less lengthly. And I hope that y'all have a wonderful week ahead! Come on in to the world, little Ellie, we are ready to meet you!

Happy New Years!

Well, its time to get back to my positiveness and reliance on waiting on God's timeline. So this will try to be a little more upbeat! I hope that everyone had a wonderful Christmas and rang in the New Year with those you love and care about...

I spent the New Year's with my parents and a couple of their friends. It was really fun... and I was really thankful that Mom invited me b/c I wasn't looking forward to ringing in the New Year at the house with just a dog to keep me company.

My "resolution" for the New Year is not to have a resolution. I'm just hoping that God puts huge desires in my heart for Him. I know that I definitely can't do much on my own motivation and while I totally know that He has caused growth in my life, and for the most part, a more positive attitude (strange how the holidays managed to squash that), I am not that much "closer" to God. So that's what I want to see this year, I know that I'll still have troubles or down times, but if I try to focus on God, everything will work out. That includes trying to accept my desires for more friends, a boyfriend or even a husband and just focusing on God and looking for the opportunities instead of getting down when things don't follow my time line.

This year is already showing a lot of promise of good times though... Little Ellie should be entering the world soon, hopefully this spring will give me a "new" job and a visit with my dearest friend Amber AND a two week vacation in Italy. I'm praying for the "regulars" at my blog and in my bible study and hoping that God will bless each of you and help you with your "resolutions" and desires for the coming year. Have a great week!